lilladyeva

So far I have been doing okay with my diet. Counting points but every day going over. I also haven't been getting up earlier. I am just so tired. I have been going to bed early at 10:30 or 11. This morning i woke up at 10:45. My personal training was cancelled and I woke up so late I didn't go to the gym. I didn't exercise yesterday either. I woke up right in time to go to therapy at 10:15.So this week was a bust for resolutions. I am going to keep trying. I don't know why i am so tired lately. I hope I am not getting sick.

Well, it's the week between Christmas and New Years. Which means I am being a trash goblin. Hanging out in my pajamas, eating cookies and unhealthy things. It's great. It's like the week doesn't count. I'll have an update on New Years with resolutions and all that. But for now, it's time to watch Brooklyn 99.

Throwback to the time my dad turned to me and said "I'm on the DL." Four years later I have not stopped laughing.

Well, this is it. Tumblr blackout day. I deleted my Tumblr. I don't know that any of my stuff would have been affected, but I follow a lot of queer communities and that always gets screwed over. I know it's been a problem with facebook but I just can't delete my facebook, it's the only way to plan things easily for all of my friends and I would miss things. I will miss my Dragon Age fandom. I tried to join one here but the mods are not active and not letting me in. Which is too bad, I wanted to discuss fan theories, like what will they do with Calpernia? She is literally my favorite character in the whole series.

I can't get into much about work on here for confidentiality reasons. But I had to deal with someone experiencing psychosis today. As a substance abuse counselor it's not something I am necessarily equipped for. Also therapy doesn't actually help active psychosis, you can't talk someone out of a delusion. I will inform their psychiatrist tomorrow. But it was an unsettling situation. They were not a danger to themselves or others and they don't believe they are delusional so hospitalization was out of the question. They don't want to go and unless they are an imminent threat I can't make them. I just hope the psychiatrist can do something more.

Been feeling some depression lately. It started out as intense anxiety, most likely work related but then the work things resolved and I was left feeling restless and on edge. I thought the weekend would make it better, it usually does but I went to a party last night and was immediately overwhelmed. It was the first party in more than ten years i went to without Alex. I feel so dependent on him, i don't like that feeling. I used to be independent, but I am not anymore. I just feel lonely all the time surrounded by people. The depression hit today. I tried to do chores to keep myself occupied, I have also been trying to make jewelry but it doesn't hold my interest. T.V doesn't hold my interest, or reading. I'm trying blogging see if it will clear my head. I have work tomorrow and I don't want to be like this at work.